“Where’s the beef???”

I just wrote this long-ass reply on someone else’s blog, then realized hey, I just produced a whole new essay. And I ain’t posted on my own site in months. Why am I out here just givin’ it away like that? So here it is. The following is in response to a white writer at his site about what his recent self-examinations have brought forth…..

Hi Frank. Been reading your posts and I appreciate that you are a white man who is consciously on the path looking at white supremacy and where you fit in it. Two thoughts I want to leave here.


You talk about how combating internal racism and implicit bias in white populations takes daily effort and consciousness. That this is true is a real testament to the potency of the brainwash socialization job that’s been done, not just to white people, but to all people. And we really have to start asking ourselves why that’s so and who it benefits. That’s the million dollar question. Then we can focus on what it’s really going to take to see change. I often marvel in my head while I’m standing at the front of the room leading my own workshops “wow. These white people had to pay money, and carve out an entire afternoon of their time to hear me say ‘treat all people well just because.’ That’s the society we live in.” And to do simply that is a day-to-day, ongoing struggle. When you really, really think about that—damn!

Moreover, black people have to put just as much energy into fighting the negative messages we’ve been given about ourselves. Ibram X. Kendi said “internalized racism is the real black on black crime,” and I’ve come to agree with him wholeheartedly. Racism has torn from all of us our very humanity. Our belief in ourselves as good people, and our belief in others as simply inherently worthy. And that is why combating it is important. Not just to “help those people.”

Secondly, I read a piece online recently about Robin DiAngelo’s book White Fragility that was subtitled: “Robin DiAngelo’s idea changed how white progressives talk about themselves—and little else.” I attended a workshop months ago that was entitled “How To Respond To Racist Remarks.” I sat in because I thought I was going to witness how white folks are arming themselves to be defenders for non-white people and I wanted to affirm and amplify their efforts. The whole afternoon turned out to really be about how white SJW’s (social justice warriors) can take care of themselves and their feelings while being about “the work.” I busted out in a huge fit basically saying “how is any of this about helping non-white people????”

People just thought “poor dear, she’s ‘triggered,’” and my entire point was lost.


Too much of white folks’ musings and ruminations about race only lead in a circle back around to—-themselves. The whole point of white folks contemplating their conditioning and their role within white supremacy is supposed to be to un-condition yourselves SO THAT YOU CAN NOW GO OUT AND BE OF REAL USE IN DISMANTLING WHITE SUPREMACY AND RACIAL INEQUALITY. I submit that it’s not enough anymore just writing and talking about what looking at these issues has helped you see about yourselves as white people.

Non-white’s struggles and suffering…we are not your whetstone upon which to sharpen and improve yourselves. We’re real people out here getting shot at by the cops, denied for home loans, being turned down for jobs because it’s too difficult to pronounce our name, getting short changed on our children’s education because municipalities don’t see the point in installing great teachers and “throwing good money after bad”—and being gaslighted and blamed for our lot in life produced by the down the line effects of those actions. I don’t mean to put you on the spot personally, this is for all the white people reading this who see themselves in your meditations. If your realizations are producing out here in the 3D world more than just new awarenesses about yourself, I’m not seeing it here. I don’t just mean what meeting you’ve been to, what committee you signed up for, what other college educated blacks you sit around talking with about racism (because only listening to other blacks who possess “the” socially approved bona fides only further recognizes white supremacy). I mean black people whose lives have been improved measurably for your change of mind. Black people sitting at your dinner table bringing the real baked macaroni and cheese. Black friends who just call you up to say hey, or whose phone calls you return with urgency because you recognize their needs as fellow human beings are as urgent as yours.


As I read this over, I guess I’m just re-saying what Howard’s been saying to you forever. Where are all these new awarenesses showing up in life where the rubber meets the road?

“Where’s the beef?”

Published by Nanette D. Massey

Trying to help my white allies figure this whole "race" thing out.

4 thoughts on ““Where’s the beef???”

  1. Nanette, from the beginning, I’ve appreciated your writing. You get right to it, and in creative, expressive ways. I presume I’m the “Frank” you mean, but I never saw these comments appear in reply to my post. I’d like my readers to see this too. So if you would, please reply there.
    Yes, this is the same message Howard has been conveying. I tried to make it clear at the end of the post that the whole point of this “work” is to check the impact of all our white stuff so it doesn’t infect our action, to give us a way to measure that. But I get that thinking about all that is still not ACTION itself. That’s why I’d like you to post this comment to my blog. Better yet: Howard wrote a guest essay for my blog about a year ago. Would you be willing to contribute this post – or some version of it – as a guest blog? It would be due to come out Dec.10. If you leave it as a reply on my blog now, I doubt that anyone is going to see it. It’s late. But all subscribers would see it next post. What do you think?

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    1. Wow Frank. I really didn’t expect this to get back to you so soon. And I certainly didn’t expect such an open hearted response. I did originally write this on your page as a response to “Layer Upon Layer” (https://staropoli.com/2019/11/11/layer-upon-layer-uncovering-bias/). Guess I didn’t hit the button right to make it happen. I’m honestly still SO clueless about how this whole inter-web thing works. I give you my permission to take this and re-post it for your next entry as a guest submission.

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